Shame they didn’t get a picture of the Prime Minister’s igloo and pet beaver.
Now I have to admit I do get a bit excited when Canada makes the news – it doesn’t happen often today two stores made ‘global’ new – and by global I mean it made it overseas to me. The two newsworthy articles included the following
1) we drink milk out of a bag…..yeah I might have mentioned this (refer to earlier posts here) …but someone made a movie out of it so its coo/weird
2) a Toronto restaurant is encourage having sex in their bathrooms for valentine’s day – what more can I say – there is no better way to get over the hurdle of being the ‘nicest’ nation in the world than encouraging fornication on the most romatic day of the year…my favourite quote was from Jim Chan, manager of the food safety program:
Toronto Public Health says as long as there’s no sex in the kitchen and the restaurant keeps its washrooms clean and sanitized, it’s not fussed. “As far as bodily fluids, it’s pretty much similar to the other human functions going on in there.”
Fair point but when you put it that way… eeeww
Am presuming the majority of stories featuring Canada from now on in will include the Olympics but until then I will enjoy trying to make it seem like tristes in the bathrooms are normal and that we really only drink milk in bags…oh yean and we live in igloos and routinely have to fight off grizzly bears to get to the store to pick up said milk.
Tx JC for the second story, can always count on you to feature Canada in a good light
So it snowed a tiny little bit on the weekend which meant there was more tv/radio/newspaper coverage about the snowiest/coldest January in 23 years. It was in one of these newspaper articles that I came across the most brilliant opinion poll…
They started off with a few simple, relevant questions about the snow and it’s impact (FYI gritted means salted or sanded):
PS Who was the 1 person who 'wasn't sure' if the snow disrupted their job...
Then they hit you with the every so scientific and my personal favourite….
What does this prove? Why didn’t they just leave it as ‘did you fall? Why did they have to add in ’someone you know’? Did they think that a lot of people would own up to it so they gave them the ‘friend’ clause. “I didn’t fall but my ‘Friend’ did.” Presumably this was the same friend who’s vodka you were holding when your mom caught you drinking in your room at 13.
Other than it being a stupid question I think they missed out on the final, and most critical question -
Did you laugh while seeing someone fall or when someone told you that they fell as a result of the weather? If so, how hard did you laugh?
Cause face it, falling is kinda funny*
*Disclaimer - Falling is not funny if it is you falling, if you hurt yourself or the person in the fall hurts themselves. It is also not funny if babies or puppies are involved in the fall – all other falls are funny .
So today marks our four-year anniversary in London and to most of you it doesn’t matter, but to me its a bit of a big deal. It’s a whole year longer than we lived in Toronto (which felt like ages) and equally long as I spent in University which also felt like a giant (and important) part of my life it is nice to think that London will be as big a part of my memories as both of those things (although, the amount of hours/days I have experienced drinking related memory loss might mean I have to stay here 5 years to make it equal 4 years anywhere else but that is just a technicality)
Anyhoo instead of pointing out the things I find weird (I will do that anyway in other posts) I will write about something revolutionary in British culture that happened today (okay it might not have happened exactly today but I only noticed it today)…..Marks and Spencer started carrying brand name products. For those of you who think this isn’t a big deal let me explain. Marks and Spencer has built it’s institution on only offering products that were made by (or on behalf of) Marks and Spencer. If you wanted Coca-Cola you bought Marks and Spencer cola, you want Smirnoff Vodka you get M&S vodka and so on all the way down from ketchup to loo roll.
Loving that Marmite and Gin are classified as favourites!
This worked because as a consumer you just knew this, you knew that if you wanted to buy Marks and Spencer pizza that you needed to go to another shop to buy Coca-Cola to go with it or if you bought cottage pie you would have to buy your Heinz ketchup to smother on the potato cheezy topping elsewhere ….now you don’t have to. And whilst I do appreciate the convenience of such a move, I do feel slightly like M&S has given up trying to make us realise there is life outside big brands and that if we wanted them that badly we would have to make the extra effort to get them. Now they are just shoving aside their own brands for the likes of Kraft/Heinz/Coke.
It sort of feels like Canada changing their name to America because everyone thinks we are American anyway….come on, what changed? what made them disallow the fancy big name products from their shelves before now? What changed? Okay I know that one, it must have been motivated by money – It’s the same reason Shania Twain is now a resident of Switzerland and Pamela Anderson is now an American citizen….I guess everyone eventually jumps on the bandwagon for one reason or another (she says whilst researching how much longer she has to wait to get a British Passport).
So this combines two things I can’t get over this week
1) Pee-Wee is making a comeback – is this really necessary? Isn’t ruining a whole generation by subjecting them to an asexual manchild sitting on a fuzzy talking toilet seat enough? do we really have to resurrect that?
2) The ipad – I am sorry but I just can’t get over the name..ipad? really? yes, I wouldn’t turn one down if someone gave me one but I wont be camped out in front of the apple to be the first gal showing off her ipad….now if it was made by RIM and had ‘berry’ in the name it might be another story but for now (but I am confident RIM wouldn’t come up with something as stupid as the padberry) you enjoy your ipad while I get creeped out by the name
Sorry guys, couldn’t embed it, you will actually have to click to see what I am on about…
http://www.funnyordie.com/videos/f7a03edbd7/pee-wee-gets-an-ipad
Was getting ready for work this morning and wondering what to post today and this little gem came on…it was like a message from a higher power.
A few questions to keep in mind while watching this
1) who are the friends/agents that told her to make a career out of this?
2) was it really necessary to send her out into Trafalgar square?
3) does this celeb really need impersonating? Isn’t one enough?
4) isn’t the point of an impersonator that they look like the person they are impersonating?
So I am still not sure that this is true but apparently two Holiday Inn hotels in London are offering a bed warming service to combat the ‘cold’ weather. Instead of handing you a water bottle or electric blanket as you would think, they are offering up real live humans to lie in your bed for 5 minutes. These bed warmers apparently wear a one piece jumpsuit (yeah that makes it less weird) for hygienic reasons and probably to prevent you from thinking that the hotel is side lining as a brothel.
Now I hate getting into a cold bed as much as the next girl but not sure the hotel-arranged stranger in my bed thing is the answer. Do you talk to the person lying in your bed in a unitard? What do you say to them? Do you tip? Is it creepy to then jump into bed and cuddle into a stranger’s warm spot? I am leaning towards yes….valiant PR effort by Holiday Inn but I think I’ll stick to a shot from the mini bar – it has the same warming effect without the awkwardness.
I am sure most people have seen this but today I dedicate the WTF? Friday post to my most favourite blog EVER (besides my own of course) …Sleep Talkin’ Man
Essentially this guy’s wife started a blog transcribing what her husband Adam mutters in his sleep – some of the stuff is so insanely funny that it has brought me to tears at the ridiculousness of what he says. There is some speculation that it is a hoax but I believe it and don’t care if it is fake as I haven’t laughed like this in a while. I hope you enjoy it even a tenth as much as checking the site for updates is fast becoming my favourite part of the day.
Warning…does contain adult language (which what makes it even funnier).
Some of my faves include:
‘So this is what it feels like to be a gummy bear’
“You can’t be a pirate if you don’t have a beard. I said so. MY boat, MY rules’
“Don’t leave the duck there. It’s totally irresponsible. Put it on the swing, it’ll have much more fun.”
The guys at Santander sure planned this well. Check out the story on the Yahoo home page on the left about poor Lewis Hamilton and his Pussy Cat Doll breaking up …. then look to the right where there was this fancy banner ad featuring Lewis Hamilton.
I am pretty sure the guys at Yahoo and Santander didn’t plan this (the ads, not the breakup – that would be weird) but I do find it funny that Hamilton is wearing the same shirt in both the article and the banner ad – and here I was thinking it was embarrassing to be seen in the same outfit in more than one facebook album.
Hey, who's that hottie over there?
Oh it's me...nice shirt
This is one of those articles that must have been a result of a very slow news day…
The article goes on to explain that since there has only been one ‘credible’ sighting of Nessie last year and none in the previous 12 months so they think that the ‘mythical’ creature may have sunk to the bottom of the lake…
Seriously? This made the news…what’s next a story about unicorns being extinct because they haven’t been seen on TV since a 1980’s episode of My Little Pony? Santa Clause on his death bed because he was only seen out one time last year? I would start with a story about whether or not there has ever been a credible sighting of said lake monster.
I have to admit, it was a nice break from all the stories about the snow..
The Sun Newspaper in reference to the football games that were cancelled due to the snow
Ooooh clever like a nightmare but with snow...
They are terrible at shovelling their field and don't even get me started on how poorly they drive in these conditions. They are god dam sheep, they are covered in warm wool, they will cope, it's the naked animals like frogs and snakes we should be worried about.
