So we are back home for a visit and out of pure necessity I have been spending between 1 and 3 hours in a car each day…a few things have changed since I have last driven 1) GPS was invented 2) you can’t use your cell phone in a car – not even texting at a red light 3) you can’t play with your GPS while in your car. Something that hasn’t changed, I am still arachnophobic. As a result of all of these I have had two driving fails
1) While driving along the highway bopping along to some (terrible) music I noticed I was tapping on the screen of the fancy GPS thingy which I had programmed to get me home. I looked down and realised that I had entirely changed my destination BUT because I can’t touch this thing whilst driving (intentionally anyway) I had to listen to it telling me to ‘take the next right and exit the highway’, ‘in 400 meters exit right, in 150 meters exit right…. for 15 minutes….technology regulation fail
2) Was bombing down the highway (doing the speed limit) last night (so it was dark in the car) when something caught my eye moving on the steering wheel – it turned out to be a big juicy spider that then ran up and over my hand. Obviously this induced a high speed panic attack which was carried out as safely as possible so as not to cause a car crash. This only succeeded in flinging said arachnid somewhere in the dark car which queued an instant case of the heebie jeebies and the feeling that a spider was crawling up my bare legs.
Knowing a I had to pull over I took the first exit and flew (doing the speed limit) off the highway ready to pull over only to find out I was in a construction zone with no shoulder to pull over on…panic ensued but I was able to talk myself down from my paranoia until I was just about home when the spider walked across the dashboard. The hubby threw his shoe at it then declared he killed it but couldn’t provide a carcass – it didn’t matter because after I got out and did my heebie jeebie dance I was convinced it wasn’t crawling on me. This morning however I got in the car presuming it was spider free until I looked on the dash and there was a big, fat spider web…it may has well have been complete with an ”f-you” message woven in the web….car+spider+arachnophobic=fail
They say things like these happen in 3’s so I’d advise anyone in the area to stay off the road for the next few days.